


Collapsed Dreams and Shattered Memories

by grimmjolion



Category: Bleach
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-02-07 16:29:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21461068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grimmjolion/pseuds/grimmjolion
Summary: Shinji's been having dreams of the past, but things aren't quite as he remembered. His relationship with his lieutenant seems drastically different and despite it being a dream, everything seems so vivid that it's leaving Shinji on edge.
Relationships: Aizen Sousuke/Hirako Shinji
Comments: 28
Kudos: 79





	1. Wake Up

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this is kind of a test run. I've never shared my writing before and I know there is a lot of room for improvement, but hey here it goes. Be kind please haha. I'll try to post the next chapter within a week or two if this goes well.

Shinji jerked himself awake, his eyes meeting the blank wall across from him which, oddly, came as a relief to him. He let out a heavy sigh and lifted his hands to his face, rubbing it gently as he tried to brush off the dream he’d had. Shinji slowly brought his hand up to comb through his hair, blinking when it wasn’t as long as he’d expected. His eyes slipped closed as he sighed again. His dream couldn’t have felt _that _real… He kicked his feet over the side of his mattress and stood up, the bones in his knees cracking under the weight of starting a new day. He slipped on a pair of sweatpants and headed out of his room in the building Kisuke had set up for them, the days of being a captain in the Gotei 13 heavy on his heart. Shinji had to admit, days in the World of the Living were much quieter than they’d been in the Seireitei, but he couldn’t lie. He missed how things used to be.

Life in the World of the Living was easier, but easier meant the days started to melt together. Shinji woke up at the same time almost every day and felt himself falling into a steady pattern. He’d eat breakfast, there would be conversation, but it rarely seemed to be any different to him. Hiyori would insult him, Rose and Love would argue about something in a manga that Shinji couldn’t care less about, Lisa would be reading something inappropriate and making comments on the side, Mashiro would be complaining to Kensei who would just start yelling, and Hachi would just be trying to calm everyone down. Shinji couldn’t think of a better label for it than simply noise and he was starting to grow sick of its repetitive nature.

He stepped into the room they used as a makeshift kitchen and dining area and sat down at the table where Hachi and Lisa were already seated. His eyes immediately fixated on the table, not bothering to follow his normal routine of making himself coffee. He didn’t see the point in doing so anymore. Hachi watched him closely and decided something was bothering him, but he didn’t want to pry. He stood up and made his way over to the coffee maker, getting out the mug he knew was Shinji’s favorite, despite them all looking the same, and setting it up so he could give his friend a small form of comfort. Hachi returned to the table and picked up a newspaper he’d retrieved that morning, paging through it and humming gently. Shinji glanced over at him, his teeth showing with a normal, bored expression on his face.

Hachi gave a knowing smile without so much as a word or a glance towards Shinji. Shinji sighed and Lisa finally looked up from her magazine, eyes only peeking over the top of it at the two boys across from her. Something was different about today and she could feel it. Shinji hadn’t even said anything obnoxious yet. She raised an eyebrow when Shinji’s eyes just returned to the table. Lisa sat up straight in her chair and set the magazine down on the table, open for the rest of the world to see, so she could cross her arms and wait for him to look at her.

Hiyori stormed in a few moments later, plopping herself down in a chair. Lisa shifted in her chair when she noticed Shinji didn’t even look up. She muttered something under her breath and Hiyori looked around with a glare. “What’s wrong with you today? You look more pathetic than normal, Baldy,” she said loudly, looking at Shinji who still hadn’t lifted his head.

Shinji sighed and closed his eyes. “I have a headache, Hiyori, can ya be quiet?”

Hiyori scoffed and crossed her arms, turning her head away from him. “Whatever,” she snapped. They sat in silence for several minutes before Hachi stood up from his chair, walking over to the coffee maker knowing it was probably warm enough by now. He poured a mug for Shinji and added the perfect amount of milk and sugar to satisfy the blond. After setting the mug on the table, he returned to his seat and picked his newspaper back up. As different as this morning felt, Hachi couldn’t deny that a quiet morning was nice for once.

That thought, however, didn’t last much longer as Kensei joined them, Mashiro close behind and already whining. “Keeenseeiiii, I’m hungry!” she practically yelled, earning an actual yell from the man she was bothering.

“Then get yourself some damn food. I don’t know why this is always my problem,” he replied, trying to brush her off as he sat down at the table, making absolutely no effort to help with her hunger.

Shinji sighed and stood up from his chair. He gave Hachi’s shoulder a gentle touch, which Hachi took as a thank you, and left with his coffee. He headed outside, wanting to be alone for a little while to process his thoughts. He stood with his back against the building, taking a few sips of his coffee as he watched a few birds fly overhead. He wanted to dismiss his dream as simply a longing for how his life used to be, but there was one glaring factor that set things apart from his normal dreams of the past. While Aizen frequented his dreams, being an important part of his old life, it had never been quite like that.

While Shinji never felt close to his Lieutenant, his dream certainly made him stop to ponder the nature of their relationship. He knew now that Aizen had followed him around malicious intentions, but could that have been the only reason he decided to stalk him so frequently? There wasn’t much that changed between nights and he couldn’t possibly imagine what kind of information Aizen could be getting from him just walking around, but that’s what most nights were. Shinji could recall just standing there, seemingly alone with his thoughts, knowing Aizen was right there watching, waiting for his captain to do something. Sometimes he’d still mutter to himself, it almost feeling like he had someone there to listen to him when it was getting increasingly harder to deal with everything on his own.

Shinji took a small sip of his coffee as a car rolled past. He watched the tires spin until they were out of sight. His gaze shifted to a couple walking on the other side of the street, hand in hand as their child trailed behind them happily. They were having a quiet conversation, smiling at one another on occasion. The remained unaware of Shinji as he continued to drink his coffee, watching them walk past as he finally decided to face his dream.

~

Shinji had been seated in his office; paperwork sprawled out in front of him as Aizen gently knocked. He didn’t look up, simply telling the boy to come in, his tone as bored as it usually was. Aizen stepped inside and walked over, taking a seat in front of his captain, a rare smile playing over his lips as he watched.

“It’s late, Captain Hirako. You should turn in soon,” he said in a quiet tone. Shinji finally glanced up at him and raised his eyebrow as the boy continued to speak. “We wouldn’t want you to be too tired tomorrow, would we?”

Shinji sighed and waved him off. Aizen had a point. He started to gather the paperwork, knowing he could just finish in the morning. He raised his eyebrow again as a second pair of hands infiltrated his desk to assist with gathering the papers. He looked at Aizen who was smiling at him in a way that almost put him on edge. He said nothing, knowing if he made a comment, they’d be there for longer than required and he just wanted to get out of there at that point. Once he finished sorting the papers, with the help of Aizen, he stood up from his desk and gave a pointed look to the boy still smiling up at him.

“Is there something ya needed, Sōsuke?” Shinji asked, realizing he never addressed the fact that Aizen had some in so late.

Aizen blinked and shook his head, chuckling softly. “Oh, no. I wanted to make sure you weren’t overworking yourself, Captain Hirako,” he said, quietly. His tone was softer than normal, almost pleasant. Shinji narrowed his eyes at him and stood there for a few seconds, taking in the smile and tone Aizen was giving him. Something was off and it was bothering him. He waved him off again and headed for the door.

“Well, I’m turning in. I’ll see ya tomorrow,” Shinji said, going to slide the door open. He paused when a hand wrapped around his other wrist. He glanced over his shoulder, his eyes meeting Aizen’s, who was now in very close proximity to him, a smile still present on his face.

“Please, Captain Hirako, allow me to walk you to your quarters.” Shinji stared at him for a few moments, the tension he’d been feeling between them only seeming to grow as Aizen continued to hold his wrist. He pulled it away, Aizen letting it easily slip from his fingers, and headed outside. While no answer was given, Aizen followed directly behind. The air between them remained thick as neither of them dared to cut into it. Shinji didn’t want to waste his time questioning Aizen’s motives, knowing he’d never get an honest answer no matter how far he dug. Aizen knew how to lie and Shinji was well aware of the fact.

Shinji’s eyes glanced sideways, fixating on the image of Aizen, still smiling. He was plotting something. It was easy enough to be suspicious of Aizen; the tricky part was trying to piece together what could be going on in his head. It was difficult to determine when one needed to be cautious around this boy and Shinji was definitely hearing alarm bells going off in his head at that moment. He was brought back to the reality of the moment when Aizen finally opened his mouth to speak. “I’m not sure if you’re aware, Captain Hirako, but you have a habit of showing your teeth the majority of the time. It happens often enough that I’m sometimes alarmed when I can’t see them,” he said softly, not looking at his captain, but speaking to him nonetheless. “It makes me wonder what’s on your mind, what could be so serious to take away such a noticeable quality.”

Shinji hummed and didn’t turn to look at him. Aizen was digging and that could be dangerous. “Perhaps you forcing yourself on my nightly walk was off putting and I’m wondering exactly what your goal for tonight is, Sōsuke.”

Aizen chuckled and nodded. “I apologize for concerning you, Captain Hirako. I just wanted to make sure you returned safely,” he replied, finally looking at his captain-studying his movements.

Shinji gave him a side glance, but turned his gaze forward after they locked eyes. “Tell me, Sōsuke, what’s changed about tonight that you’re suddenly concerned I might not make it back?”

Aizen looked toward the ground, a soft chuckle echoing through his throat. “Forgive me, Captain, but is it a crime to care about your wellbeing? You’ve been working harder than normal,” he noted, turning his head back to meet Shinji’s side eye. “You haven’t been as, let’s say, cheerful in the past few weeks. I thought it might be appropriate to remind you that you have people around you that care and would like to assist you.”

Shinji hummed again, turning his eyes forward as he contemplated the meaning of Aizen’s words. He knew they couldn’t be truthful. This did, however, give Shinji the perfect opportunity to let Aizen believe he had emotional control over him; that he fully understood how his captain was feeling. He walked up to his door, careful not to respond to Aizen’s claim to care beyond his initial hum. He turned to face his lieutenant, leaving on hand on his door, but not making an effort to open it quite yet. He kept steady eye contact with Aizen for a moment, waiting for his smile to fade.

Slowly, Shinji slide his door open and stood to the side. “Why don’t ya join me for some tea?” he suggested, watching Aizen closely to pick up on his body language rather than just his verbal response.

Aizen raised his eyebrows and let out a soft chuckle before stepping inside Shinji’s doorway. He glanced back at him on the way in, an almost playful look in his eyes. “I don’t believe you’ve invited me for tea before… Perhaps something has changed.”

Shinji scoffed and stepped in after him, sliding the door shut and heading over to put some tea on. “I wouldn’t think too much of it, Sōsuke. You’re my subordinate after all.”

Aizen chuckled at the word, watching as Shinji’s eyes darted to him as it left his throat. “You certainly treat us well, Captain,” he replied, smiling as Shinji looked back at his kettle. He looked around Shinji’s living space, taking in how little was actually present. There were papers scattered on the table and a few picture frames hung on the walls, but not much beyond the furniture occupied the space. Aizen looked at the couch the table was placed in front of and smiled at his captain once more. “May I sit?”

Aizen sat on the very edge of the couch after Shinji nodded in approval. Shinji joined him soon after, setting a cup of tea in front of Aizen on the table and then seating himself on the exact opposite side of the couch. Aizen picked up his tea and chuckled. He glanced over at Shinji while taking a sip. “Afraid I’ll bite, Captain Hirako?”

Shinji looked over at him as he sipped his own tea. “That all depends. Am I something you’d want to bite into?” he asked, trying to keep an air of danger about him, but realizing that sentence could be interpreted incorrectly fairly easily. He watched as Aizen’s eyebrows raised in mild shock at what his captain had uttered.

Aizen turned his body so he was facing Shinji, a small smirk beginning to take shape on his face. “Is that to say you bite back, Shinji?”

Shinji lightly choked on the tea that was currently traveling down his throat, looking over at his lieutenant with widened eyes. Not only was there an inappropriate playfulness in the tone of his words, but Aizen had just addressed him by his first name without hesitation. It was fine in the reverse, considering Shinji had hierarchy albeit it was still a little rude. He decided to tone the situation down, by ignoring the comment and taking another sip of tea. He kept his eyes closed as he heard his couch squeak, knowing Aizen was closing the space between them for some godforsaken reason. Shinji glanced at Aizen as he took his new place several inches away from him on the couch. The air felt thick again, the tension in the room starting to outweigh how it felt on their walk.

Shinji cleared his throat and motioned to Aizen’s cup of tea, adjusting his own position on the couch to be right up against the arm. “Ya like it? I decided to try a new flavor this time around.”

Aizen looked at him and chuckled. He looked at his cup and picked it back up, taking another sip. “It’s delicious, Captain,” he almost whispered, drawing his words far longer than Shinji felt was necessary. “You’ll have to invite me by more often. I have a few blends that might interest you.”

Shinji nodded slowly, clearing his throat again. “Perhaps we can have a small tea tasting with Captain Kyōraku and Captain Ukitake. They might enjoy a quiet day together,” he replied, trying to remove the thought of alone time between them becoming something common.

Aizen chuckled and nodded, sipping his tea once more and setting down the cup. “That sounds lovely, Captain Hirako. I’ll try and set something up in the morning.”

Shinji nodded and let out a quiet sigh. As strange as the night felt, it was almost refreshing to have someone to talk to after a long day of paperwork. Him and Aizen very rarely just sat and talked, which he knew the reason for, but He was starting to feel like he wasn’t giving this boy the benefit of the doubt lately. There was definitely a malicious aura that shrouded Aizen’s persona, but there wasn’t anything he’d done that was particularly heinous, at least to Shinji’s knowledge. Perhaps he was just being overly cautious and Aizen was the type that liked to _really _understand his colleagues before fully trusting them. That could account for all the sneaking around which Aizen was still unaware that Shinji knew about. Shinji couldn’t shake the feeling Aizen gave him, however, and the fact that he rarely seemed to be truthful. Not much could be excused for lying to someone in charge of you.

Aizen leaned a bit closer, chuckling quietly to himself. “Is everything alright, captain? You seem a bit _too _lost in thought.”

Shinji blinked, snapping back to the present situation again. He looked at Aizen and nodded. “Yes, fine. It’s late, Sōsuke. I think ya should turn in.” He set his cup down and started to stand, but Aizen’s hand was on his shoulder, holding him in place on the couch. Shinji turned his head to look at Aizen again, about to ask him what his problem was when there seemed to be no space between them anymore. Shinji’s eyes widened as Aizen’s lips slipped between his own, his other hand reaching over to hold Shinji’s hip down so he was pushed fully into the couch. He took a few moments to soak in exactly what was happening before he made a noise of protest, moving to push Aizen away from him.

Aizen, however, took advantage of this and grabbed Shinji’s wrist, pushing him back into the couch with more force. Shinji’s eyes widened even further, but he started to falter. He suddenly lost his desire to fight back and he knew it wasn’t because Aizen had intimidated him or anything of that nature. His chest felt tight and he couldn’t commit to a desire for this to end. There was something about the way Aizen held him against the couch that almost felt intoxicating. He felt himself starting to slip, his eyes falling closed as his body relaxed under his lieutenant. That was when he woke up.

~

Shinji sighed as a cold breeze danced through his hair, his lips being warmed by his coffee as he drank. He listened to another car roll past, trying to decipher all of the thoughts and feelings rushing through his head. He was truly baffled by the thought that he could’ve been suppressing feelings for his former lieutenant for all this time, but it was the only explanation he could come up with. It bothered him how vivid the dream was, genuinely feeling more like a memory. He could almost taste the tea left on Aizen’s lips. He took another drink from his coffee, trying to drown the taste. This was something he needed to work through as quickly and as quietly as he could. Aizen caused them countless problems, tearing their entire lives from them without a second thought all for the sake of an experiment. He thought nothing of them and Shinji was well aware of that. He felt dirty recalling the flutter in his stomach Aizen had given him while he slept. There was nothing Aizen could do to redeem himself and no excuse Shinji could give for deciding his feelings were justified.

He looked down the street, setting his now empty coffee mug on the ground near the door and walking away from the place he now called home thanks to Aizen. He knew if anyone could help him, it would be Kisuke. It may not be _help _he was after anyway, but Kisuke would certainly listen. Shinji headed to the little shop, still clad in his pajamas. He slipped his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants, turning his head to look at a little girl playing with her dog on the other side of the street. They were rolling around in a yard, the girl laughing loudly as the dog jumped all over her. Shinji shook his head, turning his eyes back to the ground as he walked. Aizen wanted to ruin things like that. He wanted to make people suffer for his own personal enjoyment and gain. Shinji would never understand people’s desire to use their power for anything short of helping others who don’t have the same strengths.

Shinji pushed open the door to Urahara’s Shop, peeking around inside. It seemed empty, but he knew _someone_ had to be there. He walked inside, shuffling his feet on the ground as he headed to the back. He stuck his head around the corner to look when he was greeted by Tessai about to smack him square in the face with a broom. Shinji’s eyes widened and he quickly jumped back, ultimately falling on his butt. Tessai blinked at the man on the ground, setting the brook down. “Oh, Hirako. I apologize, I thought you were an intruder.” Shinji groaned and rubbed his lower back. “Sheesh... Give out a warning next time, would ya? Just knowing someone else is here is sometimes enough to make intruders run away, yeah?” Tessai nodded and helped Shinji up. “Yes... I apologize again, Hirako. My plan was not to startle you.” Shinji sighed and waved him off, giving his own butt a little rub. “Is Kisuke here?” he asked quietly, looking up at Tessai with an almost heavy expression. Tessai stared at him for a few moments before he gave a small nod. He headed to the door that lead beneath the shop and opened it for Shinji. The blond quietly thanked him and headed down the stairs, glancing back when he heard the door close. He was thankful that Tessei understood he wanted this to be private.

Shinji looked over at Kisuke who was muttering to himself as he paced his hidden training grounds. He chuckled softly as he headed down the stairs, speaking a bit louder than usual to make sure he got Kisuke’s attention. “Seems like we’re both troubled, eh Kisuke?” The shop owner looked up at him, chuckling when their eyes met. “Ah, Hirako. Good morning.” Shinji tipped his head at Kisuke with a light smile. He joined him down on the ground and glanced over everything Kisuke had left scattered about. “Something I can help you with?” he offered, knowing Kisuke still blamed himself for everything that happened and this was probably another attempt to fix it. Kisuke shook his head and chuckled. “Just working through a few things... What brings you here this morning? You look tired. Shall I make coffee?” Shinji pulled his hands out of his pockets and held them up, shaking his head. “Oh, no thanks. Already had some. I was just wondering if we could talk.”

Kisuke gave him a warm smile and nodded, going to find something the two of them could sit on. “I take it you’re having trouble sleeping? I may have something you might find useful for that upstairs,” he stated, glancing over at him. “I can give you a discount.”

Shinji chuckled and shook his head. “Nah, it wouldn’t help,” he said as he watched Kisuke pull out some chairs from who knows where. “You’re prepared for everything, ain’t ya, Kisuke?”

Kisuke chuckled and shook his head. “Things like this are easy. There are many things I’ve faced that I was completely unprepared for.” He looked over his shoulder at Shinji before turning and motioning for him to come sit. “I think you know that more than most, Hirako.”

Shinji looked at him for a few moments before walking over and plopping down in the chair. He shook his head. “I don’t blame ya, Kisuke, I never have.” He looked over at Kisuke and said, “How many times do I gotta tell you, you can call me Shinji,” hoping it might lighten the feeling in Kisuke’s heart. He wanted him to know that he considered them friends and that he was truthful when saying he didn’t hold it against him.

Kisuke nodded and sat next to him. It’d been awhile since they just sat and talked, so he knew he shouldn’t dwell on that subject for too long. “So, Shinji, what is it you wanted to discuss? Is there something troubling you?”

Shinji nodded. “Honestly think troublin’ is an understatement. There’s something _wrong _with me.”

Kisuke leaned back. “I could’ve told you that years ago, Shinji,” he teased, hoping he could lighten the situation at least a little bit. It was uncharacteristic of Shinji to seem so worked up about something and it was throwing him off. He smiled when Shinji gave him a look of fake amusement, but it faded as Shinji’s eyes turned back to the ground. The former captain of squad 5 sat quietly for a few moments, trying to formulate the best way to discuss what was bothering him. Shinji could hear Aizen’s words ringing through his mind as he noticed he was sitting with his teeth visible. He slowly slipped his mouth closed, feeling a bit pathetic that even something that small was getting to him.

Kisuke adjusted his position in the chair as he watched Shinji closely. “You dreamt of Aizen,” he stated, almost whispering. Shinji’s eyes widened slightly as he immediately shifted his gaze to Kisuke. It couldn’t have been _that _obvious. Kisuke shook his head and leaned forward in his chair, noting Shinji’s alarmed expression. “You get a certain way when you think about him… It’s very hard to pick up on, but it’s in the little things he would have picked up on.” He gently set his hand on the other’s arm, offering him a soft smile. “It’s okay to think about him, Shinji… What he did to you, to all of you, was traumatic and you have the right to think about him for the rest of your life.”

Shinji sighed, shaking his head as his eyes returned to the ground. “It was before any of that. There was nothin’ particularly negative between us yet and it felt so real… It felt like it did before, like he was still my lieutenant.” He could feel a small flutter in his chest as he debated telling Kisuke about the nature of his feelings towards his subordinate in the dream. That was the whole reason he came there, but he was having doubts now. There was definitely something inherently wrong with feeling that way towards someone who caused _so _much grief.

Kisuke gave him a sad smile. “Shinji, he was someone you cared for. You were his captain. It’s only natural to feel guilty abo—”

Shinji clenched his fist and turned to look at him, interrupting. “Sōsuke kissed me. He kissed me and I was thrown off guard like it wasn’t my own fuckin’ dream.”

The pair fell quiet, Kisuke slowly sliding back into his chair as he watched the other. He was wondering if he really heard him correctly. Watching them interact during their time in the Gotei 13 gave him vibes of the exact opposite sort. Shinji seemed to put up with his lieutenant, but there had never been any signs that the two enjoyed one another’s company. At times Shinji even seemed to distrust Aizen, though never really giving a concrete explanation why. The air felt thick to Shinji again making him almost wish he’d never opened his mouth. They sat in silence for a few more moments, Kisuke mulling over all the different ways he could treat the situation. He wanted to be as delicate as possible, knowing that this was particularly troubling, especially considering Shinji was having a very difficult time processing what he dreamt.

Not wanting to rule out any possibilities, Kisuke finally spoke. “Is there any chance Aizen could’ve gone unnoticed in your presence recently? You don’t seem very confident in these feelings, so perhaps he had some sort of influence,” he suggested. It was highly unlikely Aizen was slipping around without Shinji noticing. He had a knack for being one of the only people to see right through him, no matter the situation.

Shinji sighed and shrugged his shoulders. “I guess it could be possible, but…” His eyes switched between the ground and the other man a few times before he decided to continue his sentence. “I still get that fluttery feelin’ in my stomach when I think about it. I almost _want_ to dream again,” he said. He was looking directly at Kisuke now, a subtle look of longing in his eyes.

Kisuke held that eye contact with him for a few moments and then sighed, giving him a gentle nod. He opened his mouth, but didn’t speak right away. He knew something like this couldn’t be helped. “I’m not sure what to say… Shinji, you can’t control who you fall for. It’s unfortunate, I know, but it’s okay to have these feelings.” He gave a little nod and reached over to set his hand on Shinji’s arm again. “I can’t even begin to imagine the pain you’re feeling right now…”

Their eyes finally parted, Shinji turning his own towards the ground again. He slipped them closed as he spoke. “It’s not gonna change anythin’, got it? We’re still gonna take that smug bastard down,” he said, almost harsher than needed. Kisuke knew he wasn’t the only one he needed to convince. He gave Shinji a nod.

“He won’t get away with what he’s done.”


	2. A Distant Memory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long and probably seems rushed! I'm dumb and decided to post the first chapter right before I had four exams and didn't have a lot of time to write. The next chapter should hopefully be up a little sooner because my semester's almost over. Hope you guys like it! Thanks for reading!

Shinji sat alone in his room. The clock on the wall ticking as the seconds passed, making each moment hang in there air longer as he waited for the next tick. His eyes were fixated on the ceiling as he debated if he should really let himself fall asleep. A sigh traveled through his room, the conversation with Kisuke long passed, but still fresh in his memory. If it was so normal to feel the way he did, why did it still seem so wrong? He was thankful, however, for the fact that Kisuke listened to him at all. If he’d opened up to Hiyori, she most likely would’ve just hit him and called him an idiot for even considering he felt that way. As much as he enjoyed the company of the other Visored, they weren’t always the best people to consult for more personal issues. While they all could be serious, it had more to do with whom and what they took seriously. Shinji struggling with the possibility of having romantic feelings for his former lieutenant would not be one of the situations taken in a serious matter.

He sighed softly, letting his eyes finally slip closed as he dreaded the idea of being alone with his thoughts more than what he could possibly dream. It was more than likely he would never have a dream similar to the previous night again. Most of the time Shinji couldn’t even recall his dreams. He slowly started to drift off, the anxiety he’d been feeling all day wore him out and sleep was much desired.

~

Shinji slowly opened his eyes, a yawn ripping its way through his body. He kicked his feet over the side of his bed and slowly pulled himself out, sighing. As much as he wanted to stay in bed, he had a lot to do. Once he was done with his normal morning routine, brushing his teeth and hair, having some tea and a little bite to eat, and slipping into his clothes, he headed out. It was particularly warm and sunny, which was something he definitely wouldn’t argue against. He glanced across the balcony, meeting Hiyori’s usual grumpy gaze. Shinji raised his eyebrow as she began to yell at him about what an idiot he was for forgetting something he didn’t even remember agreeing to. Her words started melting into the background as the reality of the situation started to settle in.

Hiyori was clad in her shihakusho and as Shinji looked around at his environment, he noticed his hair curving over his shoulders. They were standing on the balconies within Seireitei which caused him to start internally panicking. He raised his hands and interrupted her, not thinking about what consequence that might entail. “Wait, Hiyori… We’re in the Soul Society,” he said in a hushed tone. “We shouldn’t be here.”

Hiyori quieted for a few moments, staring at him like he had another head growing. “No shit, Baldy,” she yelled. “We live here. Now don’t think you’re gonna get away with blowin’ us off!” She started stomping towards him, more upset now that he seemed to be distracting her by acting idiotic. 

He started to back up, not really wanting to deal with the physical abuse he knew was coming. He had to be dreaming, but it all felt so real. He even felt as tired as he did when he laid down to sleep. It was almost as if he’d woken up in a different reality. He continued to back up until he hit something, causing him to turn around to see what it was. 

“Good morning, Captain Hirako,” Aizen greeted playfully, holding Shinji’s shoulders to keep him stable so he wouldn’t just bounce off. He began to smirk as he watched his captain’s eyes widen, giving his shoulders a little squeeze. “Can we talk privately?”

Hiyori slowed down to a stop a few feet away, glaring at Aizen for ruining her chance to really give Shinji what he deserved. She crossed her arms and puffed out her cheeks a bit as Shinji glanced over, almost seeming like he was asking for help. “Don’t think this is over,” she grumbled before turning around and walking back the way she came. She couldn’t help but wonder why Shinji had looked at her that way. Aizen was his lieutenant. There shouldn’t have been any reason for him to seem afraid and yet, he did. She’d never admit it to him, but she knew he was strong and very capable. If there was a problem, she figured he’d be able to handle it on his own.  
Shinji looked back at Aizen and gave him a noticeably forced smile. “Sure, Sōsuke, is everything alright?”

Aizen chuckled and slipped his fingers around Shinji’s wrist, leading him towards his office. He quickly slipped inside, pulling his captain along with him and shutting the door almost immediately. Shinji almost stumbled into his office and gave Aizen a concerned look. “Was that really necessary? What’s the problem?”

Aizen smiled at him. “I wanted to have tea with you, Captain. I brought a blend I thought you’d really enjoy…”

Shinji narrowed his eyes. “That amount of urgency for tea Sōsuke?” He crossed his arms and watched as Aizen headed over to prepare the tea he’d brought. Shinji was on edge and the tight feeling in his stomach only seemed to grow as Aizen chuckled again.

“Why do you continue to tease me, Captain Hirako?” he asked as he picked up the tea pot, keeping steady eye contact with Shinji. “I thought you wanted more alone time… Perhaps I’m interpreting the nature of our relationship incorrectly.”

Shinji scoffed which only seemed to bring a slight smirk to the other’s face. “You definitely are if you think I’m anythin’ other than your captain, Sōsuke. Now, we have a lot of work to get done today. It would be wise to focus on that, got it?” His tone was harsh, trying whatever he could so he wouldn’t have a repeat of the night previous. 

Aizen chuckled again as he waited for the water to heat up. He grabbed two cups and nodded, their eye contact finally broken. “I understand, Captain. I’ll do my best to impress you today.” 

Shinji watched him closely, narrowing his eyes a bit. He wasn’t quite sure why Aizen felt he needed to impress him. He sighed and stood, heading over to his desk to start on some paperwork he knew he probably had to do. Life consisted of a lot of that back then and he figured playing the part and acting no differently than he would’ve in the past might help the dreams end. If his imagination was really boring enough to focus on only dreams that were him doing work, he had a different problem. He had more faith in himself than that.

After several minutes of Shinji paging through the things he had on his desk, Aizen brought over the cup of tea he’d prepared. A “thank you” was given in the form of a quiet grunt, all of Shinji’s focus on the papers in his hands. This caused a chuckle to emanate from Aizen making the hair on the back of Shinji’s neck stand on end. Being alone with Aizen had been intimidating before any of this happened. Shinji knew it was a dream, but he was genuinely concerned about letting things persist the way they were. Even in he could separate himself from what he felt in his dreams, he struggled to understand why he had such little control over what was happening. He yawned, a wave of feeling as if he hadn’t slept for several days crashing over him. 

Aizen chuckled softly and walked over to pick up some of the documents sprawled over Shinji’s desk, sitting down to start working on them. His captain glanced up at him, but quickly looked back at his own work. Shinji was thankful to have help, but he wished it wasn’t Aizen. He could, however, handle sitting there with him quietly for a few hours. As long as they were working, he assumed nothing out of the ordinary would happen. He didn’t seem to notice at first, but he was having trouble keeping himself from dozing off, earning a few low chuckles from Aizen as his eyes kept slipping closed. It was strange that he’d felt so tired within a dream, but Shinji could remember feeling like that quite often when he was working in the Soul Society. A few more sips of tea made their way down his throat and he wasn’t exactly sure when it had happened, but he dozed off at his desk.

~

Upon waking up, Shinji was in his own bed in the World of the Living. He slowly opened his eyes and looked around groggily, bringing a hand up to his head to run his hand through his hair. 

“Weird,” he mumbled to himself before he slid out of bed and glanced around his room. Something felt off as he noticed a few things that seemed to be out of place on his bedside table. He hummed quietly and returned the items to the position they were usually in, writing it off as him bumping the table as he slept. 

Shinji got himself dressed and ready for his day before he headed down to the kitchen as he did every morning. There was one problem, however. Everything was quiet to the point it was almost unnerving. As he flipped on the light in the kitchen, everything was as it had been the night previous, indicating that no one else had been up yet that morning. He glanced back into the hallway, his eyes narrowing as the thought crossed his mind that he could possibly still be asleep. His dreams of the past felt real enough, so what was to say he couldn’t dream about his life at that moment. 

There was another thing that was off about that morning. He could see his favorite mug out and sitting next to the coffee maker, but he knew he’d cleaned it and returned it to the cabinet before he went to sleep that night. Shinji walked over to pick it up, pleasantly surprised to find a note and a warm drink inside of his mug already. 

The note read, “Hope you slept well. If this isn’t warm by the time you’re awake, I apologize, but I needed to step out. Enjoy!”

Shinji smiled and picked up the mug, grateful it was still warm. He held it in his hands for a few moments, just letting his hands heat up. He’d have to remember to thank Hachi later. He closed his eyes as he brought it to his lips, taking a drink. His mug immediately slipped out of his hands and shattered on the floor, his eyes widening. 

Hiyori had stepped into the room at that exact moment and furrowed her brow. “What the hell are you doin’, Baldy!? You got it all over the floor!”

Shinji flat out ignored her as he quickly picked the note up and ran outside. 

Hiyori blinked and glared after him, yelling as he ran. “You better not expect me to clean this up! Get back here!”

Shinji kept running until he got to Urahara’s shop, barging in and heading directly to the training grounds underneath the shop as the taste of the tea Aizen had given to him in his dream was still fresh on his taste buds. He didn’t even hesitate when Tessai tried to greet him. He stumbled down the stairs, causing Kisuke to look up at him, a puzzled expression on his face.

Shinji was out of breath, but he held out the note to Kisuke, just panting for a few seconds before he spoke. “I-is… Is this Sōsuke’s handwriting?” 

Kisuke blinked and took the note into his hands, examining it for a few moments. He hummed and motioned for Shinji to follow him as he headed back upstairs. While he was still confused about how panicked Shinji seemed, he didn’t feel asking would get them anywhere yet. He knew his friend needed answers and questions would only delay that. As they headed up the stairs, Tessai looked down at them with an equally puzzled and worried expression on his face. Something was wrong and he could tell. Shinji coming two days in a row was strange, but the fact he seemed to be upset about something he only expressed to Kisuke made it all the more mysterious. 

Kisuke gave him a gentle smile and led Shinji into a back room, trying to assure Tessai everything was fine. After a few minutes of rummaging around in the papers he had stored back there, he pulled something out and chuckled. “I have one document with his writing on it. Don’t ask me how I knew, but I had a feeling it would come in handy one day,” he said, hoping to make Shinji feel a bit more at ease. He compared the two and shook his head. “They don’t seem similar at all.”

Shinji looked relieved, but confusion soon spread across his face. He took the note back as Kisuke held it out to him so he could put the documents he’d pulled out away. Shinji let out a little huff, knowing he should probably explain himself so he didn’t seem weirder than the entire situation already seemed to be. “Sorry for doin’ that, Kisuke…” he started, rubbing the back of his neck. “I had another dream last night. It was pretty normal, but I fell asleep,” he recounted, watching Kisuke make his way back over to him and nod. “I can’t shake this feelin’… It’s pretty strange to fall asleep in a dream, isn’t it?”

Kisuke nodded again, letting out a small chuckle. “It is, but I wouldn’t call it a reason to panic. Perhaps you’ve just been getting poor sleep and your dream self was trying to make up for it,” he teased. 

Shinji sighed and nodded. “Maybe, but that’s not the only thing… Sōsuke made me this tea and—” he paused, suddenly realizing he’d just shattered his favorite mug. A frown spread across his face causing Kisuke to raise an eyebrow as he waited for the rest of the thought. “Sorry… Well, when I woke up this mornin’ no one else was up. I guess it wasn’t that weird, but someone left this note for me and a cup of what I assumed was coffee. Except…”

Kisuke nodded slowly, understanding without Shinji having to say it. “Before I say anything, is there a possibility you dreamt about that tea because you’d recently had a cup?”

Shinji shook his head. “I know I’ve had the tea before, but you can only get it in the Soul Society. We can’t go there, Kisuke. Someone somehow had access to it and there was mug of it just sitting in my kitchen when I got up.”

Kisuke hummed, his arms crossing as he thought. He didn’t want to jump to the conclusion that this was somehow connected to the dreams Shinji had been having about his old subordinate, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that the entire situation seemed off. He, however, didn’t want to let Shinji panic about the situation. He gave his head a quick shake and pointed to the note. “I’d go ask the others who left it for you. If none of them did, come back to see me, okay?”

Shinji nodded and sighed, lifting his hand to his face and rubbing it. He was starting to calm down, but he still felt a bit freaked out. If Aizen had left that tea for him, it meant he was able to get into his home undetected. He thought it odd that he wouldn’t have woken up if he’d felt Aizen spiritual pressure. The time they spent together made that feeling very distinct to him and he’d always been able to tell when Aizen was there, even if his pressure was masked. 

“Thanks, Kisuke… Sorry to keep botherin’ ya. I’ll see ya later,” Shinji mumbled, heading for the door.

Kisuke gently grabbed his arm to stop him, a small smile on his face. “I’m always happy to help. Please, even if it was one of the others, come stay here tonight. I want to test something,” he said softly.   
Shinji blinked, but gave him a slow nod. “Yeah, okay… I’ll head over after dinner, yeah?”

Kisuke chuckled and nodded, letting go of his arm. “Yes, of course. I’ll get a room ready for you. If anyone asks, just tell them you’re helping me with something secret,” he said in a playful tone.

Shinji chuckled a bit, his feeling of being on edge finally settling down enough to almost dismiss it. “Or I could just say I need a break from all of ‘em. They drive me crazy.”

Kisuke smiled and gave him a nod. “They are a rather loud bunch, aren’t they?”

Shinji sighed, shaking his head. “You have absolutely no idea. It’s hell livin’ there sometimes. Mornin’s are the worst,” he said, looking towards the door. “No offense, Kisuke, but I’d like to go check who wrote this. I’ll see ya later.”

Kisuke nodded and held his hands up with a smile. “Please, don’t let me stop you. Good luck, Hiarko. If you need to come earlier for any reason, we’ll be here all day.”

Tessai peeked out from behind the corner he’d been standing behind to give him a thumbs up. While he wasn’t entirely sure of the situation, if Kisuke wanted to extend that level of hospitality, who was he to argue? 

Shinji nodded, chuckling softly as he headed over to the door. He glanced back at Kisuke and gave him a little smile. “Thanks again… I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay ya.”

Kisuke scoffed and waved him off. “No need.”

Shinji nodded and finally headed out the door, sighing as he closed it behind him. He took a deep breath before walking back towards home at a normal pace this time. It couldn’t have been Aizen. Perhaps Hachi had just found the tea he used to like at some store in the World of the Living and wanted to surprise him. That had to be it. 

“He wouldn’t be wastin’ his time on you, Shinji, get a grip…” he murmured to himself.


	3. Spilled Tea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. Sorry this update took so long. My semester at uni started and I, unfortunately, had to put my dog down... I'm having a really hard time with that. I hope this doesn't seem rushed or too short, but things have been busy and emotional around here I just haven't had much motivation. I hope I can get the next part out to you sooner. Thanks for reading !

Shinji walked into his home and sighed as he made his way back to the kitchen. He was beginning to feel bad for leaving the mess, knowing Hiyori would give him some choice words the next time she saw him. Not to say that would be any different than normal, but he’d know he deserved it this time around. He knew she would’ve left the mess for him to clean up when he returned, so he hoped it didn’t cause anyone trouble.

Upon entering the kitchen, he immediately laid eyes on Hachi who was cleaning up the floor, several grocery bags sitting on the table next to him. Shinji frowned and stepped over to help him clean up.  
“Sorry, Hachi. I had to leave before I could clean this up,” he said with a sigh. 

Hachi smiled and shook his head, lifting up a piece of Shinji’s shattered mug. “Don’t worry about it. I’m more concerned with your mug. It was your favorite!” he replied, a frown spreading across his face. “I hope it wasn’t because of the tea.”

Shinji blinked and focused his attention on Hachi instead of the spill on the floor. “Did… Did you put that there?” he asked, urgency present in his tone.

Hachi chuckled and nodded, giving him a soft smile. “I knew you were having a hard time. I remember you having quite the affinity for that tea, so I thought I could change up your morning a bit. Maybe make today a little brighter.” He chuckled and started piling up the bigger pieces of Shinji’s mug so he could dispose of them. “While it wasn’t as I intended, things are certainly different this morning, aren’t they?”

Shinji looked relieved and continued cleaning the spilled tea. “I guess I should’ve waited…” he mumbled, bringing the rag he was using to clean up to the sink to wring it out. 

Hachi raised an eyebrow as he went to get a dust pan and broom to sweep the smaller parts of the mug off the floor. “Waited for what?”

Shinji shook his head and turned to give him a weak smile. “Nothin’. Thanks for thinkin’ of me in the first place though, Hachi. Sorry again for the mess.”

Hachi chuckled and shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. The only problem is finding a replacement mug. Can’t completely give up on something you loved that much. I’ll keep my eyes out while I’m shopping.”

Shinji smiled softly at him. “Thanks… Don’t think it’d be the end of the world if I had to find a new favorite though.”

“But maybe you won’t have to,” Hachi said with a smile. He blinked as Shinji walked over to the grocery bags and started unloading them. He almost never had help putting things away in the kitchen. Everyone in that house was only productive when being forced and even then, the word “productive” was pushing it. He decided it best not to say anything. He knew Shinji was simply showing gratitude and pointing it out wouldn’t be necessary.

Shinji smiled a bit as Hachi walked over to join him in putting the groceries away. He felt exponentially more at ease knowing that Hachi had been the one to set the tea there. It had all just been a big coincidence. Though, there was still one question looming over Shinji’s thoughts. He knew that tea had been something he could get from the Soul Society and also knew that none of them had been there recently. While that didn’t rule out the possibility of it also being available in the World of the Living, something still felt strange about the whole situation.

He decided to brush it off so nothing more than nerves considering this was tea. It wouldn’t be weird for something like that to be available in more than one place and perhaps Hachi just wanted to surprise him. Shinji knew he might have also judged the tea too quickly. He barely took a sip before assuming what it was and, considering the dreams he’d been having, it wouldn’t have been strange for his taste buds to play a trick on him.

Shinji looked over at Hachi as the last few items were put away. “Hope ya don’t mind, but I have a few things to do. I’ll be in my room if you need me, yeah?”

Hachi nodded and gave him a gentle smile. “Do you want me t bring you some coffee? I know you weren’t able to wake yourself up today.”

Shinji chuckled and shook his head, starting to move out of the kitchen. “Nah, thanks though. I think I’m plenty awake,” he said, heading to his room. His adrenaline-fueled run to Kisuke was better than any caffeine he’d ever drank.

He pushed his door open and let out a heavy sigh, sliding down against it as it closed. Shinji’s eyes slipped closed, fatigue washing over him once again. Despite actually feeling a bit rested from the previous night, the situation he found himself in was exhausting him to no end. He allowed himself to rest for a few moments on the floor before he stood to head over to his desk. He began pulling some things out, trying to find anything that seemed out of place or perhaps reminded him of something that would help explain why he’d been having those dreams.

At some point during the day, Shinji lost track of the hours he’d spent rummaging through his things. He needed some sort of closure on the matter, but nothing was helping him achieve that. He couldn’t explain why his thoughts were suddenly filled with his former lieutenant. It had been years since he thought of him as anything beyond the person who ruined all of their lives. He knew Aizen had more heinous plans in mind for the future, so he’d never be able to forgive himself for how he was feeling. 

It was Hyori’s night to prepare dinner, so she made no effort to fetch Shinji once the time rolled around. She still hadn’t forgiven him for the mess he’d left in the kitchen the minute she’d walked in that morning. She also reasoned that they usually had dinner around the same time every night, so Shinji missing it was his own fault. 

As dinner came and went, Hachi gathered a plate of food and headed to Shinji’s room, knocking softly once he got there. The conversations had been loud and rather dull, so he figured Shinji might have just been avoiding the monotony of every day life. While he understood this, he didn’t want his friend to go without eating, especially since he hadn’t seen him eat anything for the entirety of the day.  
Shinji opened the door and blinked when he saw Hachi holding a plate of food. “Oh, did I miss dinner? Wait, it’s that late?”

Hachi chuckled and nodded. “Yes,” he started, “you’ve been holed up in your room all day. Everything alright?”

Shinji nodded and took the plate of food as Hachi handed it to him. “Yeah, just thinkin’… Thanks again. Ya know ya don’t have to take care of me, yeah?”

Hachi nodded and gave him a soft smile. “I know, but it’s the least I can do. I know things can be a bit loud and obnoxious in this house and we’re not always the kindest to each other…” he said, shaking his head. “But at the end of the day, we’re all we’ve got. We’ve been through so much together I’d like to think we’re a family.”

Shinji scoffed, but smiled regardless. “A dysfunctional family,” he said.

Hachi nodded, lightly laughing. “But a family nonetheless,” he added. “Well, enjoy your meal. I have some reading I’d like to catch up on.”

Shinji chuckled and gave him a nod. “I’ll see ya tomorrow. I’ll be out tonight, so don’t wait up for me, yeah?”

Hachi raised an eyebrow. “You’ll be out tonight? Are you seeing someone and not telling us?” he prodded, genuinely curious as to where Shinji could possibly be going this late.

Shinji blushed in embarrassment and looked away, an annoyed look on his face. “No! Isn’t anyone that interestin’ around here anyway. I just asked Kisuke for some help with somethin’.”

Hachi blinked, chuckling once the information set in. “Oh, I see. Well, good luck with whatever it is you need assistance with. Give Urahara and Tessai my best, would you?”

Shinji nodded and waved him off, sighing. “Yeah, yeah, I will,” he said as he closed the door. He headed back over to his desk and took a seat. He ate his dinner slowly as he mulled over everything he’d been thinking about throughout the day. He just hoped this night with Kisuke would give him the answers he’d been desperately searching for. 

Once he finished up his food, he took care of his plate and gathered a small bag of things he’d need for a night away from home. He peeked out of his room, carefully checking that he wouldn’t run into anyone on the way out and slowly snuck to the front door. The last thing he needed would be to have to explain himself to someone nosier and less understanding than Hachi. He didn’t have the time for that nor did he wish to share these current events with anyone. 

Hyori spotted Shinji sneaking towards the door and rolled her eyes. “No one cares where you’re going, baldy. Stop acting like an idiot and just leave.”

Shinji jumped and quickly turned to glare at her. He pulled the skin beneath his eye down and stuck his tongue out at her.

Hiyori glared at him and rolled her sleeves up, anticipating a fight. “Didn’t think ya could get worse to look at. Guess I was wrong.”

Shinji rolled his eyes and turned back to head to the door. As much as he was wiling to argue with her, he, again, didn’t have the time for it. He all but chuckled to himself as he heard Hyori begin to yell in frustration when he made no effort to defend himself. He knew how much she enjoyed the fight, but would have to entertain her at a later date. 

He shouldered his bag as he heard the door close behind him and made his way towards Urahara’s shop at a fairly normal pace this time. Shinji looked around as he walked, taking in the surroundings he wasn’t usually exposed to. The nightlife hadn’t been much of his thing, so he wasn’t usually subjected to the way the town looked at night. While everything was the same, it just had a different feel to it. 

He rounded a few corners, deciding to take a longer route to Kisuke’s and just appreciate life for once. There was no point in rushing things since he’d need to sleep anyway, so what was the harm in trying to calm down before he turned in for the night. He let his eyes slip closed for a moment as a gentle breeze brushed past him. Maybe everything had just been built up stress. The mind has a strange way of presenting and dealing with it after all. He let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head at the thought. 

“I’m working myself up… This’ll all blow over in a few days. I’m just stressing myself out more,” he mumbled to himself. 

Shinji suddenly jumped as a cat’s yowl echoed down one of the streets. So much for his silent, relaxing walk. He sighed heavily and looked towards where he’d heard the cat. A cold chill ran down his spine as his eyes met someone else’s. The tall figure standing in the shadows certainly didn’t belong to a cat. He was frozen in place for a few moments, his brain not processing what he should do. Before he could weigh his options rationally, his body bolted towards Urahara’s shop.

Again, Shinji ran inside the shop without so much as a knock, almost knocking Tessai over in the process. This couldn’t wait. 

Kisuke blinked as Shinji almost ran him over, trying to steady both of them. “Hirako! Slow down,” he said with a chuckle. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” he teased, knowing that wouldn’t be surprising for either of them considering what they were.

Shinji gripped Kisuke by the shoulders and looked at him, trying to catch his breath. “H-he’s here,” he stammered. “I saw him.”


	4. A Gift

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long! Every time I sat down to write, something else came up. I hope you enjoy!

The color drained from Kisuke’s face as he stared into Shinji’s panicked eyes, his amused expression quickly being replaced by a serious one. He dared not ask who “he” was referring to, knowing that hearing the confirmation would make the situation immediately more dire. Kisuke also already knew and dragging on a conversation would put them both at higher risk. He quickly headed to find Tessai without so much as a word to Shinji. Once he located Tessai he quickly glanced out the window, speaking in a low tone. “Please put a barrier around the shop. It may not do much, but it would put me at ease.”

Tessai blinked, but nodded and did as he was told. Kisuke was very rarely one to take these types of precautions, so he knew it probably wouldn’t be wise to question him. He watched Kisuke head back towards where he had left Shinji.

Kisuke grabbed Shinji’s arm and pulled him into the underground training area beneath the shop, sighing softly as he thought about what they could do if Aizen decided to come after Shinji. He paused for a moment, looking towards Shinji as he thought. “Could you have just thought you saw him, Hirako?” he asked, trying to keep his tone soft so the other wouldn’t assume he was accusing him of seeing things. “He’s been on your mind a lot lately. It could’ve just been someone that looked like him.”

Shinji immediately shook his head. “I know who I saw, Kisuke… It was him,” he said firmly.

Kisuke nodded and sighed, leading him over to the bed he had set up for the night. “Hopefully he’s just toying with us for now then,” he mumbled, motioning for Shinji to sit on the bed. “We’ll be safe down here for now…”

Shinji sat down and looked up at the door. “Do you think this means he’s the reason I’ve been havin’ these dreams?” he asked quietly, his tone almost hopeful.

Kisuke shook his head and followed his eyes to the door. “I’m not sure, but that’s why you’re here, yeah? I may not be able to observe your dreams, but I can see if there’s anything going on out here that’s worth noting.” 

Shinji nodded and slowly laid down, a quiet sigh leaving his lips. His eyes trailed back to the door at the top of the stairs, a million questions about Aizen beginning to echo in his head. He knew there wasn’t much they’d be able to do, especially given how unprepared both him and Kisuke seemed to be. As his eyes fell back to Kisuke, he realized he was most likely wrong about that. Kisuke was bound to have several tricks up his sleeve and just the thought of that started to put Shinji more at ease.

Kisuke smiled down at him. “You must be exhausted… Please, do try and get some rest. I promise I’ll wake you if anything should happen.”

Shinji nodded slowly, letting his eyes slipped closed. Kisuke was right. Shinji’s eyelids had felt heavy all day from the lack of sleep he’d been getting. While part of him wished he wouldn’t dream about Aizen, the rest of him knew he wouldn’t get answers if he didn’t. He sighed quietly and tried to clear all of the thoughts rushing through his head. 

Kisuke sat back as he waited for Shinji to fall asleep, glancing up at the door every so often to put himself at ease. The more he thought about what had happened, the more he was able to deem Aizen had only shown up to intimidate Shinji. If he was behind the dreams, that would be the perfect tactic to cause the blond more panic than he was already feeling. His eyes fell back on Shinji and his lips curled into a small smile, noticing his breathing had slowed down. 

Kisuke glanced back up at the door as he started to consider what now seemed to be the most likely cause for Shinji’s dreams and, unfortunately, the reason Kisuke was hoping it wouldn’t be. If Aizen was using Kyōka Suigetsu to manipulate Shinji’s dreams, he’d likely need to be close. Aizen feeling the need to show himself to Shinji that night concerned Kisuke even more, but he tried to brush it off before they had more to go off of. He looked back down at Shinji and smiled slightly when he noticed he was fast sleep. He didn’t blame him for being so exhausted, however. He sat back, waiting to observe anything out of the ordinary as Shinji slept.

~  
Shinji slowly opened his eyes, a loud yawn erupting from him as he sat up. He looked around, taking in the site of Kisuke’s underground training grounds as confusion swept over him. He thought that perhaps he hadn’t had a dream that night and looked around to locate where Kisuke had wandered off to. A chill suddenly ran up his spine before he was even able to get himself out of the bed as an all too familiar voice resonated in his head.

“Confused?” Aizen asked, emerging from the shadows with a slight smirk on his face. He chuckled as Shinji started to get defensive and pulled something out from behind his back. “Relax… I’m just here to give you something.”

Shinji grit his teeth, his fists clenching at his sides as his eyes fell to what appeared to be a wrapped present in Aizen’s hands, a bow and all. “You think this is a game, don’t ya?” he growled, trying to will his zanpakutō into this dreamworld with hope he had at least that much control.

Aizen chuckled again, taking a few steps closer. “A game like this requires two players, Captain Hikaro,” he said, his tone almost teasing. 

Shinji backed up the more Aizen got closer until his back hit the wall, his eyes darting back for just a second to plan an escape route. When his eyes returned forward, he couldn’t help but gasp as Aizen appeared immediately in front of him.

Aizen offered him a smile as he held the gift out in front of him. “Please,” he insisted. “You have my word that this is all I’ll need you for tonight.”

Shinji grit his teeth and pressed himself further into the wall. “Funny thin’, but I don’t trust ya,” he snapped.

Aizen sighed, amused. He gave a small nod and took a few steps back, turning around and heading over to the bed Shinji had been sleeping in. “I should have assumed you’d be just as stubborn as usual.” He took a seat on the bed and set the gift next to him, closing his eyes as he set his hands in his lap. “I’m a patient man.”

Shinji watched him carefully, knowing this had to be some sort of trick. Still, he had an opprotunity. He bolted towards the stairs, glancing back at Aizen once he’d reached the top. His brow furrowed as Aizen remained seated on the bed, his eyes still shut. This had to be some sort of trick, Shinji was sure of it now. He slowly opened the door, carefully peeking around it to find nothing out of the ordinary. 

He stepped carefully into the shop and slowly scanned the area, deeming it empty within a few seconds. “Kisuke?” Shinji called, taking a few steps into the shop and heading down one of the corridors. Worry slowly engulfed any fear he’d had as he searched the shop, still unable to locate anyone. Once he’d checked each of the rooms twice, he looked outside, a dark and empty Karakura town greeting him. 

Shinji debated running and not looking back until he knew Aizen was long gone, but he couldn’t. He’d come to Kisuke for help and, since this didn’t feel like a dream whatsoever, he needed to do something to rescue him and the others from whatever Aizen had done to them. Steeling his gut, he used the anger he felt towards Aizen to turn back around and head underneath the shop again. “Aizen!” he yelled; his fists clenched at his sides again as he stormed down the stairs. “What’d ya do to ‘em, huh?!”

Aizen opened his eyes and turned his gaze towards the stairs, his eyebrows raising ever so slightly. “What did I do to whom, may I ask?” His inquiry sounded genuine which just pissed Shinji off further.

“To Kisuke,” Shinji started, motioning towards the chair that the shopkeeper had been sitting in before he’d fallen asleep. “Tessai, Jinta, and Ururu!”  
Aizen chuckled softly and shook his head, standing once again and walking to meet Shinji. “It seems you are confused, Hirako… They aren’t here,” he stated, watching Shinji’s angry expression deepen. “This is a dream.”

Shinji paused, confusion washing over him again. “A dream? But this isn’t…”

Aizen tilted his head slightly, his smile returning. “Isn’t in the past like your other dreams?” His smiled warped to a smirk as Shinji stared at him, shocked. “No, I figured you’d catch on by now anyway… This I wanted to give to you here,” he said as he motioned towards the gift sitting on the bed. “I wanted you to believe it was real,” he purred.

Shinji glared at him, but his eyes flickered towards the present, curiosity beginning to set in. The entire thing smelled like a trap, but he couldn’t help but wonder. “What’s so important you gave up your secret? Pretty dumb of ya if ya ask me.”

Aizen chuckled and turned to retrieve the thing in question, walking it back over to Shinji with a glint in his eye. “Why don’t you open it and find out, hmm? I haven’t hurt you yet, have I?” he mused, staring down at the blond with a smile. “I don’t see why I would start now.”

Shinji glared at him for a few more seconds, debating all of his options in his head and weighing each pro and con he could think of carefully. He slowly reached out to take the gift from Aizen’s hands, his eyes never leaving his face. The blond looked down at the thing in his hands as his eyes narrowed. It would be impossible to tell what it was without unwrapping it, considering whatever it had to be must’ve been within a box. 

At least a minute passed of Shinji staring at the box before he finally started to tear the paper off, albeit slowly. The blond tossed the bow on the ground and the paper soon followed, eliciting a small sigh from Aizen considering how meticulously he’d wrapped it and how brutishly Shinji was treating it. Once he’d reached the box, Shinji glanced back up at Aizen, opting to take a step closer to the brunette so there was a better chance of catching him in whatever trap lay behind the cardboard walls. 

As he lifted the flaps, Shinji braced himself for whatever was to come, but, to his surprise, nothing happened. He blinked when his eyes met a bundle of orange tissue paper neatly placed inside. The tissue paper quickly joined the rest of the wrapping on the ground as the former captain’s curiosity finally peaked. He almost dropped the box when he finally uncovered what had been so important to Aizen or rather, what was so important to him. His gaze quickly shifted back to Aizen; his words quiet. “How did you…?”

Aizen chuckled and looked down at the mug within the box, a perfect replica of Shinji’s favorite mug that had previously been shattered. “It’s my fault you broke it, is it not?” he asked, his hand coming up to caress Shinji’s, making sure he didn’t drop the box.

Shinji looked back down at the mug, making no effort to pull his hands away from the other. “But if this is just a dream, it won’t be there when I wake up. What was the point of any of this?” he asked, finally pulling his hands out of Aizen’s, glaring at the man in front of him.

Aizen opted for taking Shinji’s chin between his thumb and index finger instead, his smirk returning. “Ah, yes, the question I’ve been waiting for… It will all make sense when you regain consciousness, I assure you.”

The shorter man’s glare intensified, attempting to pull his chin away to no avail. “That’s not an answer,” Shinji argued, his face starting to feel a bit warm which he brushed off as anger. “Why the hell would you go to the trouble of givin’ me this shit in a dream? Why are you messin’ with me?! Just face me instead of bein’ a cow—”

He was cut off by Aizen yanking him up by the chin and forcefully pressing their lips together.  
~  
Shinji immediately sat up, gasping as he quickly looked around. He jumped when he met Kisuke’s shocked expression, one of his own very prominent on his face. 

Kisuke brought his hand over his chest and sighed in relief. “Oh, Hirako… You scared me,” he said with a chuckle. He looked at Shinji, his eyebrows raising as he watched the man scramble around looking for something. “Uh, Hirako? Is everything alright?”

Shinji slipped out of the bed to check everywhere he could, even underneath, before looking back at Kisuke. “Was he here?! Did he leave something?!”

As confusion further set into Kisuke’s expression, he shook his head. “No, Hirako, you just had another dream. Things have been relatively quiet around here,” he reassured, wondering what had the other worked up so badly.

Before responding, Shinji began to head towards the stairs. “I’ll come back later,” he stated, not even waiting for a response. “I need to check something.”

Kisuke blinked and stood up, not attempting to stop Shinji, but confused where he’d be rushing off to already. He hadn’t even asked for the results Kisuke had gathered. 

Shinji hurried out of the shop, careful not to run into Tessai yet again so he could avoid any setbacks. His eyes scanned every inch of the town he ran through as he headed back to the place he’d lived. Once the door was in sight, he slowed down, wanting to be more careful in case Aizen was there. If he’d been there in the first place, he couldn’t have gotten far yet, he thought. There hadn’t been enough time since he’d woken up for Aizen to just full on disappear, or had there been? 

As he entered the building, Shinji glanced around every corner before going further inside, his goal being his bedroom. If Aizen had to be nearby to manipulate his dreams, then he would’ve had to be near the shop when he’d woken up. Since he hadn’t seen him, he figured he might be at the next best place. 

Thankfully, no one seemed to be awake yet and, if they were, didn’t seem to be in any of the main living spaces of their shared home. Shinji walked up to his door, taking the handle in his hand and staring at the wood for a few moments. He opened the door as quietly as he could, frowning when he was greeted with an empty room. Aizen had escaped once again. Something was different, however. Upon closer inspection of the room, Shinji’s eyes met an object neatly placed on his bed. His bed, which had previously been a mess, was made and the things he’d left scattered around his room were now put away. 

Shinji stepped into his room and walked over to the carefully wrapped present on his bed, looking around at everything that had been cleaned while he’d been away. There was a part of him that was holding onto the hope that Hachi had somehow left him something identical to what Aizen had given him in his dream so he could brush that entire encounter aside, but he knew that would be too good to be true. He picked it up and carefully unwrapped it this time, sitting down on his bed as he did so and creasing the newly placed sheets beneath him. 

As his eyes met the orange tissue paper inside, Shinji noticed he’d been holding his breath. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind anymore, he knew it had to be from Aizen. No one could’ve gotten it down to the last detail and he certainly couldn’t have dreamed up an identical gift if he’d never seen it before. He pulled out the mug with a sigh, looking towards his window as his world started to feel heavy again. 

The only thing running through Shinji’s head was his curiosity as to why Aizen would go to such lengths to give him something so meaningful to him. All of him wanted to ignore the fact that Aizen had kissed him, but he couldn’t let that go anymore. Everything that he’d been going through hadn’t just been dreams like he’d thought. He’d still have to thank Kisuke, though. Without him offering to figure this out, he might not have gotten the answers he’d received that night. Despite it being the answer he didn’t want, at least he had one now.


End file.
